"Dateline needs more castration."

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Review: "Every now and then a movie comes along that really makes you feel good seeing the bad guy get it. Forget the justice system, just give the sick pedophile a fatal dose of his own medicine. Beyond the exceptional performances of Patrick Wilson and Ellen Page is a rush of good feeling that only comes with this kind of vigilante justice. Two thumbs up!"

How it misses the point: David Slade's "Hard Candy" is the story of a teenager and the pedophile that she tortures. The movie never provides a past for either character, and so the man's culpability is never absolutely certain. The girl's past and motivations are similarly murky. Slade only presents us with how these people interact. The girl puts the older man through a harrowing ordeal, thereby shifting the audience's sympathies and increasing feelings of discomfort. Does this man deserve what happens to him? Isn't the girl guilty of horrible crimes? Who is the "bad guy" here? "Hard Candy" is an intense movie, and it provides no easy answers.

Revenge movies function on the premise that the vigilante is absolutely just. There must be no doubt the bad guys deserve their comeuppance, and the revenge scenes must be cathartic for the audience. "Hard Candy," on the other hand, dares you to pity a pervert and admonish a teenager. With such ambiguity, the reviewer clearly misses the point. "Hard Candy" is not simply a revenge tale - it's far more ambitious and interesting than that. Maybe the reviewer was abused at a young age. Clearly he/she is too dumb or too damaged to think about the issues that the movie raises.

With a warped sense of justice and apparent hard-on for torture, it's easy to see how someone could mistake "Hard Candy" for a feature-length episode of "To Catch a Predator."

I'm so tempted to Godwin this post.

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Review: "The characters were cute. It was the kind of movie that made you like the people in it. If you don't like sad movies though, best not to watch. My room mate liked it a lot, it is better than some 'so-called' gay movies. At least the love between the gay boy and the st8 boy was not totally unreciprocated."

How it misses the point: Larry Clark's "Bully" is about how a group of young losers conspire to murder their friend. The friend, the titular "Bully," is truly a loathsome bastard, but few will agree that his nasty qualities justify the awful circumstances of his death. In this movie, murder so casually considered that it's disturbing. Clark criticizes the stupefying banality of these characters, and presents a dismal portrait of America's youth.

No character in this movie is likable by any metric. What does it therefore say about the reviewer that he finds these characters "cute"? Does he share qualities with them? Do they remind him of his circle of friends? Part of the movie's strength is that its characters can be found in most suburbs, so such comparisons are not much of a stretch. The relationship of the bully and his friend (the one to which the reviewer alludes) certainly has homosexual overtones, but only in terms of dominance, not lust.

With such sympathy for such contemptible people, I hope "Bully" didn't give the reviewer any ideas.

"Ignorance is strength!"

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Review: "I hate this movie so much. It might be because 1984 is my favorite book or maybe because sony owns the rights to both movies & because of this steaming pile you can no longer rent 1984 or find it on DVD. I bought a copy for $10 at Best Buy in 2003, lost it then went on a manhunt for a copy to only find bootleg on e-bay. Why you may ask? It's because it's a good movie and sony didn't want people to compare. If you gave this movie anything more than 2 stars than you haven't seen a copy of 1984. Crap, even the leader of London played Winston Smith in 1984, I made it 30 minutes with this movie and I was livid. HOW CAN YOU RIP OFF SUCH AN AMAZING BOOK?!"

How it misses the point: James McTeigue's "V for Vendetta," an adaptation of Alan Moore's graphic novel, is about how a superhuman revolutionary overthrows a tyrannical government. It successfully mashes anarchism with comic book heroics, creating a potent mix of entertainment and ideas.

Dystopias are hardly anything new in pop culture. Because it's required reading for most high schoolers, "1984" is the easiest one for many to identify. Yes, it shares some similarities with "V for Vendetta," but those similarities are also true of other movies such as "Brazil," "12 Monkeys," and "Children of Men." I just checked and the reviewer is right: the "1984" movie adaptation isn't readily currently available on DVD. Its scarcity, however, does not diminish the worth of "V For Vendetta."

Look, buddy, I know that "1984" is probably the only book you've ever read, and I can understand that you're proud of that. With hundreds of pages and big words, books can be tough to slog through, and I for one still feel a sense of accomplishment whenever I finish one. But come on, you seriously think Sony is part of a massive conspiracy to make the "1984" a forgotten classic? Please. You should broaden your horizons and direct your two minutes hate elsewhere.